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The Red Shorts™ Announced for 2016

Opportunity strikes, and the Wisconsin Alumni Association takes full advantage

Matt Rogge
March 31, 2016

The Red Shirt™ is getting a makeover! In 2016, WAA will be promoting The Red Shorts™. These red, unisex, one-size-fits-all, short shorts will replace the popular t-shirts WAA sells each year to raise money for student scholarships.

The decision to switch from the beloved t-shirts to a rayon-poly blend, hot-pants style shorts was largely based on budget. The University of Nebraska was looking to sell 53,000 pairs of red shorts that caused painful chaffing and were deemed unseemly by school officials. A clever WAA employee saw the entire lot advertised for sale on Ebay and bought them for pennies on the dollar. A motion W patch glued over the Cornhusker’s logo transformed them into The Red Shorts™.

The Red Shirt™ is available now for $3.99 each, $10 for three, and $47 a bushel.

Warning about The Red Shorts™: Do not expose to sunlight. Dry clean only. May be toxic. Highly flammable. Each pair comes with special topical ointment. Do not wear without first applying ointment. Reapply every two hours. Ointment may be toxic. Happy April Fools’ Day.

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